Anyway - don't feel sad for me. I made a mess of this one all by myself and I have noone to blame but me. So I'm off to down a glass of something bubbly to while away the lonely night with Pretty Woman and a take away - living the single gal dream.
But as I lifted myself to sit up, I noticed there was blood everywhere. On the walls, on the bed sheets. Everywhere. Scenes from American Psycho triggered in my mind as I frantically checked myself under the sheets. Had I randomly come on? No. Was I injured? No. Did it hurt anywhere? No. Had he sold my internal organs on the black market? No obvious signs of trauma... so where was this smattered blood coming from? And that's when I noticed it...
He walked toward me totally unaware that he was being judged harshly by the creosote & cream woman before him - he had Ray-Bans and a little dark facial hair which made him a little better from the neck up. And that's when it happened. He smiled.
'What the fuck is that smell?' April asked herself, brushing off the thought that the stench might possibly be coming from her. But it became abundantly clear as the smell wafted outward in all-consuming waves, filling the room with the scent of death and rot, that it was in fact April's puss that was causing the unpleasantness.
'Don't come in my mouth,' she prefaced in her usual way. So, of course, what did Brad proceed to do mere moments later? The crime we all know and hate; they come in your mouth anyway.
Was he too drunk to get it up? Stage fright? Overwhelmed by the expectations of the beautiful companion he was now going to try to pleasure? We can't be certain. Whatever the reason though, Daniel's lank willy hang there totally nonplussed.
At this point any number of things were rotating around Jenny's drink-addled mind. Had I let him have sex with me unprotected? If so, is he riddled with more STDs than a Tudor man living in a whore house? Did he tell them he did me up the arse? Oh God, Oh God! On and on her wicked little mind worked itself into a frenzy.
And then he came. And he came. And he came. And just when she thought he could have no drop of fluid left within him...
I looked down; my boob was a little swollen but that was actually a joy to see - anything adding volume to the chest was welcome. But the swelling couldn't be causing that discomfort? It was coming from my nipple, the very tip of my nipple. I turned my head down to inspect further and saw a tiny stream of pinkish, diluted blood running down my ribs and pooling in my belly button before sliding its final descent to the drain below. Where was that coming from?